Getting into Fetish: A Guide to Meeting Fetish Men Through Recon

    You may have heard a lot about Recon over the last month, with Fetish Week London taking over the city. Maybe you’re already a member or you want to find out more following the events. Whether you’ve just downloaded the Recon app – or are thinking about doing so soon – you may be wondering how to get the best out of it. What makes the perfect profile? How do you find the right guys? How do you begin a conversation?

    Our guide is here to help.

    Filling out your profile

    First things first: you need to create a profile. Don’t just upload one old, poorly lit photo and hope that’s enough. Put as much detail in there as possible, because this will increase the number of messages you receive from the right guys. If you’re not clear about what you want, the guys browsing your profile won’t know either. Take care to choose your ‘primary interests’ – you’ll appear in other members searches for those specific terms.

    When it comes to photos, choose a few up-to-date ones, including at least one which shows your face. Let everyone who cruises your profile know what to expect and don’t be afraid to show off your favourite fetishes, whether you’re into rubber gear, pups and handlers or bondage.

    Finding the right men

    The Recon app allows you to search members which match your specific requirements, so you don’t have to spend hours browsing through hundreds of profiles to find the right men (unless you want to, of course). You can search by age, interests, location and more. You can even view who’s online right now, enabling you to begin a conversation straight away.

    If you’re planning to attend one of Recon’s upcoming events, you can view the attendee list and find guys to connect with that way. Asking them about the event and if they are looking forward to it is a good ice breaker.

    How to start a conversation

    Saying ‘Hi’ might not always cut it. Chances are the person you’re trying to chat to receives several messages a day, and they’re not going to reply to every single one. A generic message isn’t going to excite them, so what can you say to get their attention?

    A compliment is always going to go down well: tell them how great they look in their picture and let them know you share similar interests. Make it clear you’ve read their profile and be confident – they are sure to pay attention.

    Once you’ve got a conversation started, just be yourself. By paying close attention to their replies, you’ll be able to see how keen they are and what sort of relationship they are after. If you decide you don’t really connect with each other, feel free to move on.

    How to stay safe

    Meeting new people is great fun, but you should always aim to stay safe, both online and offline. Here are some general tips for safer online dating:

    • Never put personal information, such as your work or home address, your email or date of birth, on your profile as criminals could take advantage.
    • For a first meet, it’s often good to arrange to meet up in a public place and let a friend know where you’re going, who you’re meeting up with, and how long you’ll be gone.
    • If you feel comfortable doing so, ask them for their phone number before you meet and call them so you can get a better feel for who they are.
    • If you have any doubts at all, don’t meet up with them.
    • Always feel free to say ‘no’ – you don’t have to commit to anything you may have promised online.
    • If you’re planning to engage in any play, know your partner’s limits first and agree the terms beforehand.
    • Don’t feel pressured to drink or take drugs on a date and never accept substances from someone you don’t know.
    • If something that you didn’t consent to does happen, report it – no matter how minor.

    For more safety tips, read our guidelines.

    We hope you enjoy using the Recon app and website and meet the fetish guys you crave.

    Want to find out about different fetishes, join the recon community at